Searching for Miscarriage Answers

As many of you know this past year we had 3 miscarriages in 10 months.  We lost Baby Corey last March at 7 weeks, Baby Taryn in August at 11 weeks and Baby Adonia in November, just days after finding out that we were pregnant.  It was a sorrowful year and all this was very confusing to us as well.

I have learned so much through these experiences, but one thing that I noticed was that miscarriages are rarely talked about.  It’s a hard experience to go through. But because its rarely talked about those of us going through it don’t know what to really expect.  From the physical pain to the emotional and spiritual consequences.  And for that I am so thankful for all the many of women who wrote or called to share their stories with me.  And if miscarriages aren’t talked about, I realize that people’s struggle with fertility is rarely talked about either.

We often wonder why our friend “so and so” hasn’t had children, or we ask how they haven’t had children for years then all of a sudden have sextuplets.  How did that happen? We wonder if it was “natural” or if they “got help.”  So when we were going through this, it was so good for me to hear other peoples stories.  It was good to know that someone has gone through what I have.  Not for the comfort of someone else’ sorrow, but to hear what some of the possibilities could be.  When we want to have kids we think, “we know how babies are made, lets just do it, and voila, everything will be easy and go great.”  “Miscarriages and struggles with fertility are issues other people deal with, not me.”  At least these thoughts came into my mind at some point.  But here we are with 1 healthy, (and pretty stinking cute daughter), 3 miscarriages and now pregnant for the 5th time.

Here I share our story of having miscarriages, to wanting answers, to seeing an infertility doctor, to now being 14+ weeks pregnant.

To start, we conceived and had Calliah Grace with little complications.  It did take us 8 months, but that’s nothing in the land of infertility.  It was hard waiting, but once we were pregnant, we heard nothing but great things from our doctors and midwives.  So, when we had “multiple” miscarriages we weren’t sure what was going on.

After losing Taryn in August our midwives recommended that we go see an infertility doctor over at UNC-REI (Reproductive, Endocrinology and Infertility) to see if we could get some answers.  (Which to us was a HUGE blessing, most doctors won’t refer you until you’ve had 3 miscarriages, and in the medical world a miscarriage is only considered that if there is a heartbeat.) We met with Dr. Evans-Hoeker and knew right away that we loved her.  She spent a good amount of time with us and explained all the possibilities and explanations.

Basically it could be 1 of a handful of  things. (The list was explanations and reasons for multiple early miscarriages, we knew we could get pregnant, just didn’t know why the baby wasn’t able to stay alive.)  Here is the list that was applicable to us:

1.  Random with no scientific reason
2. Genetic- we could have chromosomal-trans location, which basically meant that we could have a healthy baby, then a baby with chromosomal issues that would not be able to live.
3. Structural- fibroid, cysts, something with the fallopian tubes or uterus, etc.
4.  And a bunch of blood work stuff (thyroids, lupus, vitamin deficiencies, etc.)

(There were a couple things that didn’t apply such as obesity and diabetes)

First, they did all the blood work and it all came back normal.  We were thankful, but knew that we had several more tests to go through. Then the blood work for the Chromosomal testing was drawn but the results would take several weeks.  In the meantime we had our HSG (hysterosalpingogram), the x-ray of my uterus and fallopian tubes, and everything was normal there too.  Another sigh of relief that we wouldn’t have to have surgery or some other major problem. At this point we thought it must be genetic.  This was very scary for us.  To think if we wanted to have more biological children that there could be a huge risk of more miscarriages.  And the question of could my heart handle it, knowing that the risk would be higher with this “condition.” However, those results came back clear.  Yay!  We were so thankful! But after all this testing we still didn’t know what was causing the miscarriages.  There was a lot of comfort knowing that we were “ok” but it was still hard not knowing what was causing the miscarriages.

I have tracked my temperature for Natural Family Planning for several months over the last couple years and realized that my Luteal phase (time from ovulation to start of next cycle) was only 7-9 days.  This phase must be at least 12-16 days in order for your body to produce enough progesterone to sustain a pregnancy.  (Obviously there is a lot of reasons as to why your body needs progesterone, why it needs to be that amount of time and how it all works, but I’ll spare you all those details- but it is interesting and amazing how our bodies work)

At this point, Dr. Evans-Hoeker put me on Clomid (a medicine that helps you ovulate and in my case where I already ovulate, it regulated my cycle) at the beginning of our cycle then after ovulation I took a progesterone supplement.  After knowing we were pregnant we stayed on the progesterone supplement until we were 10 weeks and we had multiple ultrasounds during this time and saw that the baby was growing and doing well.

And this is our story from the last 4 months.  I know its not everyone’s, but this is ours.  And I am thankful for where we are in this pregnancy.   We don’t know if we will have to go this route with subsequent pregnancies, but we will deal with that bridge when we come to it.

Again, we have been so supported through this process and feel so blessed by our friends and family that have walked this journey with us.